Racism Can Play in Peoria. What About Your Local Wrestling?
*Blog post started on November 24, 2020.
I think we will get into the post's movie review rather quickly (Spoiler: So I thought.). Yes, Trump is starting to accept reality, but it has only been a day since I knocked out my review for the tragic misuse of the North American treasure, Keanu Reeves, in "Siberia". If there is a video game titled with the same pronunciation of your movie title (As I verified that on Wikipedia, I found out that "Cyberia" was also the title of a UK-based industrial act called Cubanate. At least one positive came out of that $0.55 rental.), we are not expecting romance to trump the diamond smuggling drama.
It is actually appropriate that I finally opened my first Netflix DVD of the billing cycle, "Slither", because I just got word today of a COVID-19 outbreak at my parents' house. At least Mom (Negative while older sister and Dad are positive.) will appreciate that this feature is from the guy who brought Rocket and Groot to the big screen.
The more I think about, the more spooked I get. Dad has beaten cancer thrice, survived a heart attack before those scares, and successfully held off the diabetic diagnosis for nearly 70 years (about twice as long as I did). He even won a trivia night at The Fox Pub when a kidney stone decided to it needed to be passed during the game. If anyone can beat the disease it is him, but I worry that writing about it is just going to jinx him.
And when I take into account when his father died, the patriarchy fell apart. Grandpa went, the truth about his prejudices came out, and then the subsequent families started feuding. The last couple of years have left me pondering some of his (or Mom's expressed through him) biases, but I cannot help but wonder if the four children and wife will be warring. Regardless of my differences with my folks and younger siblings (I shared a room with my brother from his birth until the little sister went to ISU. My first roommate upon moving out was my little sister.), we have always gotten a long. If I look back at my mom and her family when my great grandparents passed, it just seems like everything can (will) go to hell with a loss in a family (A bitter sibling of Mom's came back to our life upon their mom's death.).
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If I would have gotten the news about yesterday, "Slither" would have been the ideal, ironic distraction. But, it is Tuesday. "AEW Dark" just cannot muster a card up to take the edge off and you know my unwatched movies are all a little too far on the dark side to relax to. Did I enjoy "Slither" enough to purchase it on iTunes (It was $4.99 and yes, it was purchased)?
Slither (2006)
Wheelsy,
South Carolina is so busy getting ready for deer hunting season, no one
notices a meteorite that crashes in the nearby woods. If there is any
noticeable drama, it is the gossip about the relationship between the
prettiest biology teacher at the high school, Starla, and her wealthy,
older husband, Grant. Sheriff and codependent childhood friend of
Starla, Bill suspects and accepts that it is a marriage of convenience,
and trusts she made the best decision while he still longs for her.
Unfortunately, if there was any flame, it is waning. Feeling rejected, Grant decides to go out to a bar and flirts with Brenda, a fellow classmate of Starla. They drunkenly end up in the woods. He thinks better of pursuing an affair, and had the perfect way out of the situation. The two have stumbled upon the meteorite, and Grant chooses to investigate the slime that is trailing away from it. In an inebriated state, Grant ends up to close to the larva like organism and is stung. After regaining consciousness, he has only one thing on his mind. Meat.
Beyond Grant's carnivorous obsession, everything seems normal and perhaps better in terms of his marriage. That is until his cravings lead to him skipping out on the Deer Cheer Dance, a celebration to kickoff hunting season. It turns out he skipped out to kidnap and impregnate Brenda with his parasite. When Starla finds him at home after the dance, he is starting to mutate into something alien as well.
Bill is investigating the disappearance of Brenda while Starla is trying to figure out what Grant is hiding. After Grant catches Starla snooping around, he seems intent on killing her, but Bill and his fellow deputies arrive on the scene. Grant transforms into something that is halfway between squid and man and escapes. Three days pass, and there are a lot of dead live stock and pets littering Wheelsy. The impatient mayor and Bill gather a posse to hunt down Grant, but it turns out Grant was laying a trap for them.
When they locate an alive but beyond bloated Brenda, she explodes into thousands of slugs. These slugs enter their victims through the mouth and allow Grant to control them. The town is quickly infected, and wanting to reconcile with his wife, Starla is kidnapped. It is up to Bill and Kylie, a high schooler who seems to have success fighting these slugs off to save the day. Here is hoping a grenade compensated from some passing fishermen will be enough to end this nightmare.
"Slither"
is a close to perfect horror comedy for adults. It features the body
horror you typically see in David Cronenberg features while always being
aware that you may just need to laugh in the face of the ridiculous, no
matter how horrific it maybe. In a way, this feature is "Gremlins"
without the constraint of a PG rating. The story has a lot of elements
that are laid out wonderfully, leading to a roller coaster scream of
joy.
With having so much rising action, the audience may get annoyed that there is not gore through out, but the audience is treated to great performances from Nathan Fillion, Elizabeth Banks, and Michael Rooker that give you the expectation that when it hits the fan, it must be spectacular. The only annoying thing about any of the acting is that with the exception of Rooker, the southern accents are not to authentic (What is one to expect from a mostly Canadian cast?). But it is a comedy and James Gunn knows that the audience is coming in feeling smarter than his characters, so this serves to let the audience know they are all in on the joke.
Regardless of the jokes, the gore effects and rejection of the boundaries of good taste allows the audience to still be shocked and horrified. The humor allows any audience to stick with it to the end, but the graphic violence makes sure that horror fans are quite appreciated. The finale is a bit overly drawn out, but if you are horror aficionado you will just admire everything Gunn is playing homage to, including his Troma roots.
If you are trying to introduce someone to horror who swears they have a sturdy their stomach is, "Slither" is the perfect flick. The humor will keep any audience involved while shocking non-genre and amusing the gore hounds. It is almost sad that this cannot cause the damage that "Gremlins" did to 80s' kids. I got over that trauma after 30 years.
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