What
does not sound good about this premise? Steven Seagal faces off against
vampires with the support of Linden Ashby (Johnny Cage from Mortal
Kombat) and Keith David. This sounds like made for video gold as long as
it can deliver regardless of whether or not the director gives their
all. Unfortunately, "Against the Dark" fails on the box art promises and
fails to give us vampires or enough Seagal.
It is not like there is not enough of him to go around no matter how the
dark and claustrophobic scenes try to cover it. The story focuses on
the survival of six people trying to escape a hospital filled with the
infected. The only thing vampiric about these monsters is they stay out
of the sun light and occasionally try to reason (a total of three times
in 94 minutes), otherwise they are pretty much running zombies. Seagal
and his group of hunters are only out to kill these confused undead and
they show up every now and then, but by no means are they truly
intricate to the plot especially since our protagonist never decides to
stick with the bad asses.
Why did critics ever knock Don Bluth for only offering 80 minute movies?
Any short cuts to the ending would have been great in this film that
seems to be nothing more than Seagal's acceptance that he is over the
hill and fat.
Yes, swordplay is expected when one is dealing with paranormal
opponents, but Seagal’s main appeal is him throwing bad guys to horrid
deaths. The audience has to wait 90 minutes for that, and all he does is
throw a few of them through walls. Most of the other action is provided
by Tanoai Reed (stunt double/part-time actor) along with the only joke
in the picture. The limited screen time leaves me with the assumption
that Seagal cannot physically cut it anymore. Nothing about Seagal’s
character is explored making this picture the ultimate bait and switch
especially since David and Ashby are not kicking any ass.
"Against the Dark" knows that it wanted to have the nocturnal undead and
that is all. It could not decide what it wanted to do with them. It is
not “Marked for Death with Vampires,” and it is not “Under Siege with
Vampires.” Either of those plots could have been improved with the
homonus-nocturna, but without Seagal willingness to fulfill the needs of
these premises, it ends up being a bad B-movie without a sense of
humor.
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| /9gag.com |
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