Tonight, I should not have an excuse to avoid bed. Cold fried chicken awaits me (too bad throwing peppers on top of a sauce makes atomic wings from Wingstop nearly inedible, hence more cooking to be done) at home and my "Fucking Brilliant" journal is at least in the car. My streak of movie reviews will continue, provided I remember to take it from the car to the desk. Because of this, "Last Week Tonight" should be the only programming I need (Why did last night's episode of Comedy.tv have to to feature Maria Bamford? I needed sleep). There should be no need for me to access Amazon Prime to watch an 80's horror movie.
I do fear my satire is falling to the wayside by doing this movie catch up. It makes me reminisce of my second trip through Illinois Central College. Give me due dates, and I will deliver something to be defanged by the competent editor. My righteous butt appreciated the awareness during the second half of my time at ICC's newspaper, The Harbinger, but it was fun putting the reputation of the paper on the line with pro-steroid pieces.
Steroids, that is probably a good spot to stop tonight. Dolph Ludgren, Michael Jai White, Danny Trejo; these are all stars in the journal. The only other thing on my mind is how The Wrestling Compadres may have managed to prevent me from cancelling them for another month. Praise the "Tom Magee" documentary on the WWE Network while bad mouthing me for not wanting to watch a booking turd like "Money in the Bank" inspires to me to want to engage in their tit for tat, despite the number of times I have been edited for their own su-su-su-su-spect devices. Thrice, pro-feminism views had been cut.
All these movie reviews I am teasing have wrestling parallels, so I should stick to the transition, but when I think about all the times I have been edited, it makes me wonder if I should just try to podcast. My stuff looks good written, but how does it work for the audiophiles? Anchor (thanks for the tip Spotify) says it is easier than ever to find out.
Podcasting does seem to be about talking in circles, so my writing should be fine. At least I know it is better than that in..."Armed Response," the WWE film where I regret giving Seth Rollins 90 minutes to shine a turd, hence why I will not let his A.J. Styles's match inspire me to watch twice the poor writing to get to.
Armed Response: Working the Broom the Match
When WWE says they want to attach you to a film, you will not get to offer a negative response. From a certain legitimate podcast ("The Art of Wrestling: Thanksgiving 2014"), it seems that you just say, "Thanks for the time off." Pretend that making a film is like the TV format, celebrate the lack of bumps and hope you do not have to do the favor for Anne Heche. Insist that the sentient, telepathic prison scores the fall. This is the Gene Simmons produced "Armed Response."
Still recovering from letting go of his daughter's bike too soon during a lesson adjacent a highway, Gabriel (TV's Dave Annable) is called back to action by his former army comrades Isaac (Wesley Snipes) and Riley (Anne Heche) to investigate why they lost contact with a high tech black ops prison called a Temple. The crew that was facilitating this were also brothers-in-arms that they served with in Afghanistan. Since Gabriel designed this complex, he is obligated to find some answers.
Can we get a movie where the site is not full of mangled corpes? These mysterious events probably happen all the time, but it is usually a router problem. Hence, we do not hear about it, so we can not presume any other movie cliches.
Temples are an over-sized interrogation system that can measure body chemistry to determine the correct answers of its prisoners. The goal is to avoid the need for torture. But everyone wants to torture someone, and it seems that is no different when it comes to the Temple itself. Everyone in the Temple have their sins, and this house of truth will administer punishment, technology, physics, and chemistry be damned. If you break laws, so will it.
Viewing "Armed Response" was not that painful for me. I was watching this flick hoping it would allow fellow Danny Daniels disciple Seth Rollins a retirement plan, so focus was skewed. Upon reviewing my memories, this is the worst WWE Studios's film to date (at least when featuring WWE talent).
Director John Stockwell had a hell of a 2016. "Countdown" was a great B-movie and "Kickboxer: Vengeance" was better than the original Van Damme film. I suppose WWE thought he was talented enough to make a flick with nothing but past their prime stars and an empty building. This film shows that he is not the Soska Twins (check out my "See No Evil 2" review).
And this incomprehensible script further pisses me off since I cannot get anyone to request a treatment of "Main Event of the Dead." Feel free to email me at russthebus07@gmail.com.
It is called an Intellectual Property. You must have intelligence in your story to earn that distinction. If you do not, you make anyone who lacks tax issues dumber for working on this. No wonder Rollins said yes to Shield reunions instead of taking his ball and running to off to another promotion.
The next worse WWE flick is the Soskas's "Vendetta", but it is light years better than this. It was Dean Cain versus the Big Show. That film gave us something to care about. "Armed Response" is a ghost story without any ghosts. Ghost are supernatural. Computers are not.
Annable is not a star, so it is nothing versus nothing. Snipes and Rollins are the undercard, so there is nobody who can get you invested in this flick. Maybe if the film explained how parallel prison walls can rip limbs from someone, disbelief can be blissfully suspended.
The WWE producers of "Armed Response" should be sued for defaming Stamford's name. If a story makes less sense than Doctor Chris Amann's lawsuit against the Second City Saints, it should not have been green lit regardless of what an idiot from Kiss says.
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| https://teaser-trailer.com/movie/temple/ |
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