90-Minute Netflix: 2047: Sights of Death (AKA Death Squad)

 

Posters with Armed Older Action Stars Best Be Expendables Knock Offs

I finished "Iron Fist" and, though I thought it was a fine martial arts series, I can only deal with so much Finn Jones (why is season five of "Game of Thrones" considered a weaker one?). Thus, with an hour and a half before the news cycle, "Defenders" was not an option. Tennis had screwed up ESPN, so I was left at a loss for live TV.

It has been a tough few weeks existentially. I have been trying to move on from the I Hotel, but what will that gain me. Less headaches for one (as I just received the call that it was a good thing that I had not purchased Riot Fest tickets). Imagine an organization whose pay roll company can screw up a payday over a holiday weekend. After they failed to take my implication that I wanted to use up my vacation time on this slow week, make believing their incompetence takes less effort that what the cast of "2047: Sights of Death" put into their performances.

imdb.com/

That last comparison does not apply to Rutger Hauer and Michael Madsen's performances. They seem to revel in the stupidity. Hauer seemed like he had more fun in "Death Squad" than he had when he worked with Dario Argento. Madsen seemed to enjoy his time on set with the promise of vengeance for Bill's brother bud. Otherwise, "2047" is a semi-talented cast believing there would be special effects added in post.

By 2047, the Illuminati has used their influence to destroy any country that refused to join their confederation. Being free of restrictions and regulations, the new confederacy has let most of the world become a radioactive waste land. The only resistance that seems to be making a difference is "Green War" led by Sponge (Danny Glover) with his butt firmly glued to his chair surrounded by CRT monitors and ham radios. His top soldier is Captain Ryan (Stephen "Pardon the Spelling Error" Baldwin) who was recently shot down during a mission to destroy a downed satellite that contains records of their communications.

Determined to complete his mission, Ryan trudges through a contaminated quadrant to locate the satellite. On this death march, he finds companionship from the red-painted mute warrior girl, Tuag (no photo on IMDB), a radio, and a mountain of dead bodies which could bring down the Confederation. The findings inspires him to broadcast his position in hopes that someone on their side will extract him to safety and document his discoveries. The only response that means anything since Sponge is too old for this shit is from Colonel Asimov (Hauer) who is personally going to oversee a death squad with the assistance of mercenary and harsh fellatio critic Lobo (Madsen). Will Ryan survive Beyonce's descendants and radioactive hallucinations to save humanity? Since everyone seems to have bulletproof skulls, the density of Balwin's skull may just make him invincible.

"2047: Sights of Death" makes me long for Albert Pyun's films like "Cyborg" and "Adrenalin: Fear the Rush" to be recirculated on the streaming video rental stores. He set the standard for how to shoot a bad action flick with only one set. Pyun must have a carefree personality because his casts seemed to have fun filming. A payday for community theater, why would you not be happy with that arrangement? I suppose a language barrier might make one reconsider.

"2047" was directed by Allessandro Capone, an experienced Italian-director with a resume that does not seem as varied as Lucio Fulci, hence, he does not have the sense to take a budget on four former A-listers and the worst Baldwin and just go camp with it. As the film goes on and slows down time with nonsensical revelations, Capone relies on quick cuts to try and provide an illusion that action is occurring. This leaves us watching a poor 360-degree video, but there is a story, so we are compelled to stick around for a conclusion.

No 360-degree video has a conclusion is the lesson to take away from "2047: Sights of Death." Anyone stuck in this video cannot be taken seriously. Hopefully, Darryl Hannah learned this lesson. As for Baldwin, this may be the perfect purgatory for a Trump supporter.

 

 

90 min. Netflix "4 Got 10": Once Upon a Time with Zero Whimsey

 

a.k.a. "The Good, the Bad and the Dead"

It is a lot of work, but you need to do a little research once you say to yourself, "This could be fun." If a film has two titles, skip it. This will require both IMDb and Wikipedia, but until WWE licenses a Bray Wyatt montage before Nefllix's direct to DVD acquisitions, how will you know when to run.

Dated Wrestling Rant:

And that's how you increase your shareholders profits Vince McMahon. If you take that money and buy the "Broken Universe" from Anthem, the stock might result in a $1 dividend. GFW will survive as well. Preventing bad Dolph Lundgren flicks from being viewed is best for business.

Back to a tale of Wasting of Danny Trejo:

It is obvious a drug deal has gone bad. A used car parking lot (if not a car lot, a lot with a Martin Luther King Blvd address) with a corpse for each bumper serves as an homage to the desert standard "No Country for Old Men" set. Adding title cards for each archetype is usually the indications of an action flick with clever ambitions. Unfortunately, there is no witty dialogue when the sheriff (Michael Pare) shoots his deputy to go James Brolin on us only to receive a life-threatening shot to the ear from an amnesiac survivor (Johnny "Eric Young should have best cast" Messner). To keep the audience thinking, director Timothy Woodard Jr (who seems to have taken inspiration stylistically from Uwe Boll) is going to use a twist for every scene.

The primary twist is not the amnesia gimmick, it is the fact that the dead deputy is the rebellious son of Mateo Perez (Danny Motherlov'n Trejo), the biggest drug dealer the DEA has ever known. Perez will be on a quest for vengeance, the sheriff is out to save his own neck, and Rooker (Lungren) is trying to put the pieces together. With so many supporting players, the clueless amnesiac is suppose to hold the film together. Too bad there is not the necessary nudity or action sequences to amuse us on his quest to regain his memory.

"4 Got 10" has a shorter plot synopsis than "Death Squad", so that means it will be less painful. If you can endure the first 70 minutes, where only three rounds are fired, you will be rewarded with "MST3K" worthy, slow-motion-dependent action sequences. You may never curse Zack Snyder again. #releasethesnydercut

Woodward must have been desperate to avoid this film from being labeled a short. The overuse of slo-mo is so bad that you can see the stuntman's flammable gel before he goes up in smoke while still holding his own in a fire fight. If the humor was more than Lundgren digging through a truck stop trash can, we could have had a so bad it is good film.

"4 Got 10" is evidence that all screenwriters should follow the page a minute rule. If Sean Ryan did this, there would have been no reward in sitting through this garbage. Hence, it would not have been made. With that said, try googling "Danny Trejo slow-mo gun fight" and you may receive the fruit of this labor without wasting so much time.

Perhaps "4 Got 10" is the Li'l Bub of bad movies. No, that is probably "The Beast of Hollow Mountain" which is part of Netflix's "Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Return." Netflix has you taken care of regardless.

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/c6/45/ac/c645acaaf4923f911c3f099876fd4690.jpg

Truck Stop DVD - "Countdown" Good, but Not the "Sudden Death" Remake We Were Hoping for.

Dolph Ziggler the Movie: Good, but Not Title or 3,000 Screen Ready

Finally, my wrestling-themed Tublr (Rip 'Em System) can promote my movie rantings. If only I could have debuted my Danny Glover, Rutger Hauer, Darryl Hanna, and Michael Madsen masochistic experience by comparing that Stephen Baldwin to the bloodless era of WWE. A missed metaphor?

After the failure that was "No Holds Barred", WWE has yet to make movies to truly promote their primary product. It anything, these films are just opportunities for Vince McMahon to display what would be too much for even the Attitude Era: The horror franchises that fit Kane's gimmick; Rape being the ultimate heel move; Gimmick matches based around murder.

"Countdown" promoted itself as the first film to include the product. It was supposed to be "Sudden Death" at a house show. Since that feature was one of my favorite Jean-Claude Van Dam flicks, Dolph Ziggler's first starring vehicle's premise had potential.

Ray Fitzpatrick (Ziggler) is a burned out cop with nothing to lose, and that gets results. Unfortunately for him, internal affairs frowns upon shooting your partner like Sterling Archer would shoot Cyril to avoid blowing your cover, regardless of how many Russians you irritate to preserve the American way of life. Concerned for his pension, Lt. Cronin (Glenn "Kane" Jacobs) places the super cop on paid suspension with hopes that the critics will forget about his antics.

It is not his critics that the Seattle Police Department should be worrying about. The next day, a Russian obsessed with Ray's exploits sends them a video of a child who is strapped with enough explosives to obliterate a 40-yard radius. If Ray does not deliver $2,000,112.35 to the bomber at the WWE show, he will make a phone call to vaporize the youngster and any neighbors.

Like one of every three WWE angles, the exchange does not work out. Ray is able to kill his foil before he can set off the bomb, but that leaves us with no one who knows where the kids is. With the suspension leaving our hero with no regulations, he is going to harass every criminal west of the Urals until he saves the day while IA member Julia Baker (Katharine Isabelle) will try to piece the chaos together and keep Cronin off his tail.

"Countdown" decides to be clever instead of obvious and ridiculous, and it works. This is good because the direction is not there.

The first act was put in the can very quickly and the false and actual finales are chock full of continuity flaws. Michael Finch and Richard Wenk's script is a fool proof 80's film and Dolph Ziggler is not expected to emote anything but Mel Gibson's hippest, pro semetic attitude.

The script goes to some odd places, but with every ridiculous hunch Ziggler's character has, Isabelle's role is there to make sure the cynics will suspend their disbelief. Eventually, your only complaint is that they only cast two WWE talents to act. And they still find a way to emasculate Rusev.

/www.pinterest.com/negretealex5

Alexander Kalugin is a great Willem Dafoe knock off, but the rest of the thugs should have been "superstars". If you watch Southpaw Regional Wrestling, you know all of the Smackdown roster attempting Russian accents would make this a VOD rental/purchase instead of waiting for it to be streaming for free.

If you need a WWE fix while you are waiting for the WWE Network to give you a promo to return, first watch "AEW Dark" and "NWA Powerrr". If that is not enough, then "Countdown" is your methadone. Like any illicit drug, you can find this movie at truck stops, in the DVD bin with at least two other good WWE Studios flicks packaged with it. (I have yet to watch "The Condemned 2" so perhaps four.)

"Countdown" is silly like the current product and clever like ECW. The only thing it lacks is the nudity and graphic violence to be an ideal 80's action flick. Most importantly, this is the best of use of Dolph Ziggler since April of 2013. This feature is a product for the smarks who need to see this guy fully utilized.

I think Dolph is overrated as a wrestler, so please see this film to put Ziggler's career in an ideal direction. Or petition WWE to create a TV Championship if we must compromise. Just cheer for him cashing checks instead of hoping he wins world titles.

90 min. Netflix "4 Got 10": Once Upon a Time with Zero Whimsey

a.k.a. "The Good, the Bad and the Dead"

It is a lot of work, but you need to do a little research once you say to yourself, "This could be fun." If a film has two titles, skip it. This will require both IMDb and Wikipedia, but until WWE licenses a Bray Wyatt montage before Nefllix's direct to DVD acquisitions, how will you know when to run.

Dated Wrestling Rant:

And that's how you increase your shareholders profits Vince McMahon. If you take that money and buy the "Broken Universe" from Anthem, the stock might result in a $1 dividend. GFW will survive as well. Preventing bad Dolph Lundgren flicks from being viewed is best for business.

Back to a tale of Wasting of Danny Trejo:

It is obvious a drug deal has gone bad. A used car parking lot (if not a car lot, a lot with a Martin Luther King Blvd address) with a corpse for each bumper serves as an homage to the desert standard "No Country for Old Men" set. Adding title cards for each archetype is usually the indications of an action flick with clever ambitions. Unfortunately, there is no witty dialogue when the sheriff (Michael Pare) shoots his deputy to go James Brolin on us only to receive a life-threatening shot to the ear from an amnesiac survivor (Johnny "Eric Young should have best cast" Messner). To keep the audience thinking, director Timothy Woodard Jr (who seems to have taken inspiration stylistically from Uwe Boll) is going to use a twist for every scene.

The primary twist is not the amnesia gimmick, it is the fact that the dead deputy is the rebellious son of Mateo Perez (Danny Motherlov'n Trejo), the biggest drug dealer the DEA has ever known. Perez will be on a quest for vengeance, the sheriff is out to save his own neck, and Rooker (Lungren) is trying to put the pieces together. With so many supporting players, the clueless amnesiac is suppose to hold the film together. Too bad there is not the necessary nudity or action sequences to amuse us on his quest to regain his memory.

"4 Got 10" has a shorter plot synopsis than "Death Squad", so that means it will be less painful. If you can endure the first 70 minutes, where only three rounds are fired, you will be rewarded with "MST3K" worthy, slow-motion-dependent action sequences. You may never curse Zack Snyder again. #releasethesnydercut

Woodward must have been desperate to avoid this film from being labeled a short. The overuse of slo-mo is so bad that you can see the stuntman's flammable gel before he goes up in smoke while still holding his own in a fire fight. If the humor was more than Lundgren digging through a truck stop trash can, we could have had a so bad it is good film.

"4 Got 10" is evidence that all screenwriters should follow the page a minute rule. If Sean Ryan did this, there would have been no reward in sitting through this garbage. Hence, it would not have been made. With that said, try googling "Danny Trejo slow-mo gun fight" and you may receive the fruit of this labor without wasting so much time.

Perhaps "4 Got 10" is the Li'l Bub of bad movies. No, that is probably "The Beast of Hollow Mountain" which is part of Netflix's "Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Return." Netflix has you taken care of regardless.

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/c6/45/ac/c645acaaf4923f911c3f099876fd4690.jpg

Truck Stop DVD - "Countdown" Good, but Not the "Sudden Death" Remake We Were Hoping for.

Dolph Ziggler the Movie: Good, but Not Title or 3,000 Screen Ready

Finally, my wrestling-themed Tublr (Rip 'Em System) can promote my movie rantings. If only I could have debuted my Danny Glover, Rutger Hauer, Darryl Hanna, and Michael Madsen masochistic experience by comparing that Stephen Baldwin to the bloodless era of WWE. A missed metaphor?

After the failure that was "No Holds Barred", WWE has yet to make movies to truly promote their primary product. It anything, these films are just opportunities for Vince McMahon to display what would be too much for even the Attitude Era: The horror franchises that fit Kane's gimmick; Rape being the ultimate heel move; Gimmick matches based around murder.

"Countdown" promoted itself as the first film to include the product. It was supposed to be "Sudden Death" at a house show. Since that feature was one of my favorite Jean-Claude Van Dam flicks, Dolph Ziggler's first starring vehicle's premise had potential.

Ray Fitzpatrick (Ziggler) is a burned out cop with nothing to lose, and that gets results. Unfortunately for him, internal affairs frowns upon shooting your partner like Sterling Archer would shoot Cyril to avoid blowing your cover, regardless of how many Russians you irritate to preserve the American way of life. Concerned for his pension, Lt. Cronin (Glenn "Kane" Jacobs) places the super cop on paid suspension with hopes that the critics will forget about his antics.

It is not his critics that the Seattle Police Department should be worrying about. The next day, a Russian obsessed with Ray's exploits sends them a video of a child who is strapped with enough explosives to obliterate a 40-yard radius. If Ray does not deliver $2,000,112.35 to the bomber at the WWE show, he will make a phone call to vaporize the youngster and any neighbors.

Like one of every three WWE angles, the exchange does not work out. Ray is able to kill his foil before he can set off the bomb, but that leaves us with no one who knows where the kids is. With the suspension leaving our hero with no regulations, he is going to harass every criminal west of the Urals until he saves the day while IA member Julia Baker (Katharine Isabelle) will try to piece the chaos together and keep Cronin off his tail.

"Countdown" decides to be clever instead of obvious and ridiculous, and it works. This is good because the direction is not there.

The first act was put in the can very quickly and the false and actual finales are chock full of continuity flaws. Michael Finch and Richard Wenk's script is a fool proof 80's film and Dolph Ziggler is not expected to emote anything but Mel Gibson's hippest, pro semetic attitude.

The script goes to some odd places, but with every ridiculous hunch Ziggler's character has, Isabelle's role is there to make sure the cynics will suspend their disbelief. Eventually, your only complaint is that they only cast two WWE talents to act. And they still find a way to emasculate Rusev.

/www.pinterest.com/negretealex5

Alexander Kalugin is a great Willem Dafoe knock off, but the rest of the thugs should have been "superstars". If you watch Southpaw Regional Wrestling, you know all of the Smackdown roster attempting Russian accents would make this a VOD rental/purchase instead of waiting for it to be streaming for free.

If you need a WWE fix while you are waiting for the WWE Network to give you a promo to return, first watch "AEW Dark" and "NWA Powerrr". If that is not enough, then "Countdown" is your methadone. Like any illicit drug, you can find this movie at truck stops, in the DVD bin with at least two other good WWE Studios flicks packaged with it. (I have yet to watch "The Condemned 2" so perhaps four.)

"Countdown" is silly like the current product and clever like ECW. The only thing it lacks is the nudity and graphic violence to be an ideal 80's action flick. Most importantly, this is the best of use of Dolph Ziggler since April of 2013. This feature is a product for the smarks who need to see this guy fully utilized.

I think Dolph is overrated as a wrestler, so please see this film to put Ziggler's career in an ideal direction. Or petition WWE to create a TV Championship if we must compromise. Just cheer for him cashing checks instead of hoping he wins world titles.

90 min. Netflix "4 Got 10": Once Upon a Time with Zero Whimsey

a.k.a. "The Good, the Bad and the Dead"

It is a lot of work, but you need to do a little research once you say to yourself, "This could be fun." If a film has two titles, skip it. This will require both IMDb and Wikipedia, but until WWE licenses a Bray Wyatt montage before Nefllix's direct to DVD acquisitions, how will you know when to run.

Dated Wrestling Rant:

And that's how you increase your shareholders profits Vince McMahon. If you take that money and buy the "Broken Universe" from Anthem, the stock might result in a $1 dividend. GFW will survive as well. Preventing bad Dolph Lundgren flicks from being viewed is best for business.

Back to a tale of Wasting of Danny Trejo:

It is obvious a drug deal has gone bad. A used car parking lot (if not a car lot, a lot with a Martin Luther King Blvd address) with a corpse for each bumper serves as an homage to the desert standard "No Country for Old Men" set. Adding title cards for each archetype is usually the indications of an action flick with clever ambitions. Unfortunately, there is no witty dialogue when the sheriff (Michael Pare) shoots his deputy to go James Brolin on us only to receive a life-threatening shot to the ear from an amnesiac survivor (Johnny "Eric Young should have best cast" Messner). To keep the audience thinking, director Timothy Woodard Jr (who seems to have taken inspiration stylistically from Uwe Boll) is going to use a twist for every scene.

The primary twist is not the amnesia gimmick, it is the fact that the dead deputy is the rebellious son of Mateo Perez (Danny Motherlov'n Trejo), the biggest drug dealer the DEA has ever known. Perez will be on a quest for vengeance, the sheriff is out to save his own neck, and Rooker (Lungren) is trying to put the pieces together. With so many supporting players, the clueless amnesiac is suppose to hold the film together. Too bad there is not the necessary nudity or action sequences to amuse us on his quest to regain his memory.

"4 Got 10" has a shorter plot synopsis than "Death Squad", so that means it will be less painful. If you can endure the first 70 minutes, where only three rounds are fired, you will be rewarded with "MST3K" worthy, slow-motion-dependent action sequences. You may never curse Zack Snyder again. #releasethesnydercut

Woodward must have been desperate to avoid this film from being labeled a short. The overuse of slo-mo is so bad that you can see the stuntman's flammable gel before he goes up in smoke while still holding his own in a fire fight. If the humor was more than Lundgren digging through a truck stop trash can, we could have had a so bad it is good film.

"4 Got 10" is evidence that all screenwriters should follow the page a minute rule. If Sean Ryan did this, there would have been no reward in sitting through this garbage. Hence, it would not have been made. With that said, try googling "Danny Trejo slow-mo gun fight" and you may receive the fruit of this labor without wasting so much time.

Perhaps "4 Got 10" is the Li'l Bub of bad movies. No, that is probably "The Beast of Hollow Mountain" which is part of Netflix's "Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Return." Netflix has you taken care of regardless.

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/c6/45/ac/c645acaaf4923f911c3f099876fd4690.jpg