Monday, May 30, 2022

NinetyForChill: The #Podcast - Explicit "DOOM": Ta2squid X Trash Panda

NinetyForChill.com: The #Podcast

Episode 70: Explicit "DOOM": Ta2squid X Trash Panda (featuring more "Bros" than a wrestling promo).

Eva the most electrifying kitty

Explicit DOOM: Ta2Squid X Trash Panda

May 31, 2022

Come for a chat about Karl Urban and The Rock's 2005 video game movie adaptation "Doom". Stick around for Cool Movies Darth's not safe for work conversation about wrestling and podcast merchandising featuring Andras from Ta2squid Podcast and Kollin (and his kids) from the Trash Panda Podcast.


Allow me to get out of third-person. Happy Prof. Shurtleff of Illinois Central College? I (CM Darth) will try not to make so much light of violent death in this summation. This is my declaration of changing perspective. 

Since this is an episode featuring one half of the Trash Panda Podcast, expect a lot of attempts at comedy from everyone involved. I bring up the comedic elements because this podcast ended up being a comedy of errors. It was the "Wheel of Horror" podcast that expressed interest in doing a podcast about the first R-Rated Dwayne Johnson movie. Andras and Kollin wanted to join in, and the recording was scheduled.

Of course, "Wheel of Horror" is one of the best movie podcasts that I had recently listened to. And to maintain this stature, they needed to keep up on the new releases. Thus, "Top Gun: Maverick's" debut had to understandably take precedence on May 26. At least this allowed the three of us to compare and contrast Tom Cruise's franchise to the influential series (at least to Brian Griffin) of "Iron Eagle".



I should say, Andras and I got to educate Kollin about 80's fighter pilot movies. Did we do the same with "Doom" is the more pressing issue.

90-min. Prime Video: "Forbidden World" Away from the Bernie Bros

 *Blog started on April 11, 2020.


News is still centered around the pandemic, so despite my shortened work days, it has not been overly difficult to catch up on the news websites. Last night, I tried to distract myself from going after the #NeverTrumpNeverBiden movement to attack the first three conservative Twitter users who went after Representative Ilhan Omar for trying to catch the nation up with the rest of the Western World. The social media platform maybe too diluted now because it use to be when I would attack hashtags (not users) like #PatriotsUnited, #Trump, #Jesus, I received a lot of hate for it. Now, these cunts are just ignoring it. It must be all about your follower count I suppose.

Too bad this blog is going to conclude with a movie review. It seemed fitting to find a place to start listing the names and profile information of the deplorables I found in every blog post. Then again, that might just encourage people to continue being the worst the United States has to offer who are not an offspring of Donald Trump whos life revolves around kissing Daddy's ass. I am calling you out Baron.

Maybe I have lost some of my passion for politics. Acquaintances from Morton are sharing and reacting positively to my Facebook posts. What does it take to get unfollowed? I guess my tolerance for bullshit is gone. This week has led me to unfollow anyone implying that they are not going to vote for Joe Biden.

It all ends up being a conspiracy by the baby boomers. Millennials were given everything growing up, so they feel entitled. Thus, they need to get their way or no one gets their way. Their parents were playing the long game. Be pushed around and underappreciated by your crotch fruit so that these twats feel like the world owes them just as much as you. Hillary Clinton fairly beat Bernie Sanders, so they voted against all of their interests instead of protecting some of them via Jill Stein or Donald Trump.

Sadly, they seem to be idiots who Sanders' free education would be wasted on. These kids are acting like they have not learned and will burn this current world down by letting Trump win again. The tactic this time is probably skipping the polls which would be worse than voting for a third party. If we can at least win the Senate, Trump would be effectively powerless and Ruth Baders Ginsburg could finally relax.

The rode to hell is paved with good intentions. How else did you expect me to transition this rant to a Roger Corman movie? He knew that we needed "Alien" and "Star Wars" to feature over-the-top gore and female nudity, but what we got was a cinematic purgatory in "Forbidden World.

Forbidden World (1982)

Being awoken to battle some space pirates, Troubleshooter Mike Colby's robot custodian SAM-104 advises him that he has received a new assignment. The two are to head to planet Xarbia to contain a research experiment that may have gone wrong or horrendously right. Dr. Hauser and his team have been trying to develop a new food source to solve all galactic hunger concerns by creating organisms with Proto-B DNA. It seems a noble cause, but because it is playing God, they are isolated on this deep space planet.

This new DNA's metamorphic nature puts into question who is actually playing the all mighty on high. The latest mutation decided to kill all of other test subjects before cocooning itself in the lab. Its violent nature leaves Colby believing that it needs to be terminated, but Hauser and his primary assistants want to see how this plays out...even after it attacks the janitor and escapes the lab. 

Technically, the cleaning guy is still alive, just dissolving into protein with a pulse. That sounds like a fate worse than death, so the majority of the crew is ready to side with Colby's intentions. The minority seems a little to eager to further study the events, so everyone will eventually be on the same page, but will they have enough numbers to battle the large-toothed, intelligent insectoid that it has become?

IMDb.com - Forbidden Planet (1982)
IMDb.com - Forbidden Planet
Roger Corman's importance to cinema should make his last name an entry in the Oxford Dictionary. Aside that word should be the primary poster for "Forbidden World". It tells you the film knows what you want, but this is still a deal with the devil.

A few months ago, I had watched the Corman-produced "Galaxy of Terror". It was entertaining enough despite a haphazard story, so I expected this feature to be the same. Aside from the reuse of James Cameron designed sets and overall tackiness, this film lacks the originality of its predecessor, and once we witness the space dog fight (from Corman-produced "Battle Beyond the Starts") and concept of hypersleep, you know you are just settling into a cheap knock off of the biggest sci-fi of the time.

The acting is hindered by everyone trying to be either hip or sexy, with our male cast focusing on being David Carradine hot, so it feels like 2000's indie wrestling. Its special effects are all around laughable with an Ed Wood equivalent monster as the villain and a robot that just misses the mark. There are some good gore effects too start, but it all just becomes a mess of red and transparent gelatin by the end of the flick.

Despite all of its flaws, it does show the beauty of a good Corman production. In trying to differentiate itself from what it is ripping off, possible inspiration for classic films are present. The monster's development is very much like 1995's metamorphic alien film "Species", and the demise of the beast is very similar to the end of "Species 2". It attempts to improve on some of the sequences from "Alien", which you have to applaud the effort, and in turn offers up devices that may have been used in that film's sequels.

If anything beyond the production values can be said to have aged poorly, it is all the female nudity, but I can defend that. "Game of Thrones" first season is classic television and it shows us that sexposition is still a valid storytelling device.

With some Clark & Sheffield Vodka, Kahlua and Meijer's brand Italian Sweet Crème Coffee Creamer, "Forbidden World" was a fun experience. If you can talk some friends into watching it with you, there are few better celebrations of mediocrity. This is not art, but you will not feel dirty seeing classic films being subverted and perverted. You can accept that is just part of the deal if a flick has been labeled a Roger Corman Cult Classic.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0083
IMDb.com - Forbidden Planet

Monday, May 23, 2022

NinetyForChill: The #Podcast - Ally’s Trans-Atlantic Woody Allen Horror Tour

NinetyForChill.com: The #Podcast

Episode 69: Ally’s Trans-Atlantic Woody Allen Horror Tour (What's Scarrier: Woody, Lame Horror, or Cheap Horror?).

Eva is not impressed by cosplay


Ally’s Trans-Atlantic Woody Allen Horror Tour

May 24, 2022
No guest this week, so Cool Movies Darth returns to the cheap DVD bin that Ally of Ally's Accessories Shop on Etsy provided him. This portion of the A to Zed journey takes us on a scary tour. Scary to some with the Steve Martin's Woody Allen inspired "L.A. Story" and Woody Allen's "Midnight in Paris". Scary to the rest for featuring Lucio Fulci's "The New York Ripper". "Out of the Dark" represents Colombia and "It's My Party and I'll Die If I Want To" stands up for Pittsburgh.


Allow me to get out of third-person. Happy Prof. Shurtleff of Illinois Central College? I (CM Darth) will try not to make so much light of violent death in this summation. This is my declaration of changing perspective. 

With ThePoeticCritic giving me two hours of content last week and a super podcast planned this week, I did not put a lot of pressure on myself to find a guest. Because most of the episodes seem to be devoted to singular features, it is tougher to incorporate the Trash Feature Revue into those additions. It is kind of nice to have a week where I have to force myself to dive into the $3.33 movies the podcast is kind of based on.

Take note that many of these movies are inexpensive as opposed to being trashy. When I told Ally that I was looking for trashy movies, she stuck to the initial parameters of the podcast, features between 74 to 99 minutes. Like most people, she does not go looking for movies that seem bad or obscure. This means I occasionally get some gold like "L.A. Story" and "Midnight in Paris".

And there have been some instances where Ally gets me a movie I have already embraced. "In & Out" went straight (ironic) to the collection shelves instead of sitting atop my rarely used Victrola. How can you relax when you got to flip the record over? It is sad I cannot get any pseudo intellectuals to listen to my rare Naked Raygun.

Pinterest @mikeleen
Pinterest @mikeleen

When it comes to diamonds in the rough, the letter "N" feature in the Trash Feature Revue was supposed to be "The Night Listener". It got two thumbs up from "Ebert and Roeper", but the thumb that sat in for Roger was Jay Leno's. ThePoeticCritic assured me of the film's reputation, but it was tough enough for me to finally accept a Sarah Jessica Parker movie must be watched.

Instead, I chose to try to keep a theme for this episode. With two movies representing cities, it only made sense for a third. Thus, my raffle prize from B-Fest came to good use.

"The New York Ripper" was an appalling movie when I saw it 12 years ago, but it actually displays the talent of Lucio Fulci. His "Gates of Hell" trilogy is legendary, but this giallo film showed me that he can work in less than fantastical worlds. And of course, who does not want to revisit early 80's Time Square. Fuck Rudy Giuliani.


The substitution guaranteed me that this Trash Feature Revue was going to be 80% fun. I am not a paranormal movie fan, so a movie about Columbian ghost children was not going to entice me. "Out of the Dark" does have Stephen Rea, and that is usually a sign of some potential. Too bad the lack of renown for latter Scott Speedman and Julia Stiles movies is ever present.

Now, Julia has said some things to dismiss our attention, but what did Scott do? Did he ask for too much money for "Underworld" 4 and 5? If Cube got a cameo in "The Return of Xander Cage", why not Speedman?

Tuesday, May 17, 2022

NinetyForChill: The Podcast - Earth Girls Are Easy: ThePoeticCritic Responds

NinetyForChill.com: The #Podcast

Episode 68: Earth Girls Are Easy: ThePoeticCritic Responds (If it's Carrey, Goldblum, or Davis, the lasses I asked said: Yes!).

A chilled Skimble approves


Earth Girls Are Easy: ThePoeticCritic Responds

May 17, 2022

Jeff Goldblum + Geena Davis + Jim Carrey = A great way to beat the monotony of shallow, capitalistic existence. CoolMoviesDarth was his standard dower self going into the weekend while ThePoeticCritic was sour about the lack of cool guests going into the Chicago Con season. Needing summer to start now, CM Darth turned to an 80's camp classic he just never got around to, "Earth Girls Are Easy". TPC just happens to offer some of the best insights into this Julie Brown vanity project.


Allow me to get out of third-person. Happy Prof. Shurtleff of Illinois Central College? I (CM Darth) will try not to make so much light of violent death in this summation. This is my declaration of changing perspective. 

I kind of pulled this interview out of my ass. My big sister stated she was down in a Twitter post and was hopeful for fun clips be suggested to her. John Oliver's web exclusive about "Air Bud" and a Fred Ward joke did not seem like it would be enough to cheer her up, so I chatted with her on Facebook Messenger. That is where I suggested the only Jeff Goldblum musical that I was aware of, and for someone who is a little reluctant to chat, she jumped at.

It was not an easy viewing. My crappy modem from Xfinity gave out minutes in as I was streaming it. After a reset, Pluto TV made me regret my sound board investment. Damn those commercials are loud (and not varied enough). I suppose it was appropriate for plenty of commercials for "Love Match Atlanta" to be placed in a romantic comedy.


After the film and finding out that Great Value's Crystal Light Lemonade is not a vodka mixer, the podcast started. We do spend about 20 minutes catching up (We are both on six-day work week schedules, so running into each other in person is tough.). This lead to me using the "Spinal Tap 2" announcement as a transition to the film. Gods bless Michael McKean, especially before he started getting type casted.

Tuesday, May 10, 2022

NinetyForChill: The #Podcast - Turning Red...Red Dwarf

NinetyForChill.com: The #Podcast

Episode 67: Turning Red...Red Dwarf (Cat People Comedy and Canadian Pandas).

Eva tolerate Holopanda

Turning Red…Red Dwarf

May 10, 2022

Cats and pandas come to the rescue this week on NinetyForChill.com. "Turning Red" was released to physical media this week, so Cool Movies Darth found that we have a Pixar movie with the ideal runtime. That amused him for one night, but the greatest amusement may have been discovering "Red Dwarf XIII" was a TV movie. Enjoy this homage to the commonwealth and forgive his fandom that he may mistake for cultural knowledge.


Allow me to get out of third-person. Happy Prof. Shurtleff of Illinois Central College? I (CM Darth) will try not to make so much light of violent death in this summation. This is my declaration of changing perspective. 

I like to thank those who responded to my most recent call for podcast guests. We should have an exciting episode (or experiment) for May 31, but getting four blokes together after a failed episode with only one person in another time zone (We are not calling the Jessica Kwazz "Spaceballs" episode as a failure.), asking them to rush for the immediate week is not fair. Fortunately, the planned gimmick for the second season of NinetyForChill was to switch between solo episodes and guest episodes. At least that is how I am dealing with my social ineptitude.

The only issue this week was, I did not have any more half hour episodes to recycle for YouTube's sake. It does not feel right to only offer 15 minutes of content two years into the podcast. Taking a hit seemed like the only option. And then the serendipity came to save the show.


When delivering a PS5 to my little brother, he told me about his subscription to BritBox to catch up on all the British comedy that Mom should not have let a nine and three year old engage in. "Red Dwarf XIII" was on my mind, so I decided I was going to binge the series to make something of my weekend. Little did I know, "Red Dwarf: The Promise Land" was a TV movie. Thus, we have two Red-themed features to discuss.

For a "Red Dwarf" fan, this film was awesome. It may have left me watching with red-tinted lenses, but if your into subversive and dry humor, you will love this movie as well. This is what you would want to see in a sequel to either of "Monty Python's" finest films ("Holy Grail" and "Life of Brian"). The formula is like the TV show, but is brilliantly paced and only hindered by the laugh track.

Who would not want to watch a movie about well-meaning monks/drunks being chased by cats who have evolved into humans while maintaining all the meme-worthy traits? A cleaning robot and an obnoxious hologram who is dependent on being attached to his charger are essentially responsible for ensuring that a drunk/god successfully carries on humanity is comic gold. If you do not have time to watch 12 seasons to understand this series, this film will give you a vibe that will inspire you to watch the rest (or at least seasons 3-8 and 10-12).


Of course, the rose-colored inspiration for this double feature was Pixar's "Turning Red". The DVD box says the runtime for this feature was 1 hour 40 minutes, but they were rounding up. We operate on the Kessel Run math hear at NinetyForChill. With that said, please revisit "Solo: A Star Wars Story". LucasFilm needs our support to get the franchise back on the big screen sooner rather than later.

I have heard nothing but good things from my friends who have seen this film, but the controversy surrounding it made this something I had to watch. Why does it ignore 9/11? How can any white male relate to this cartoon? Will Disney ever release Pixar films to the theaters? Is Disney hiding Pixar movies on their streaming service to ensure their originals get the best animated feature Oscar?

With how great this film was, the latter may have been confirmed. I have yet to see what ThePoeticCritic rated this feature to determine if this is a contradiction.

As for being unrelatable, that must be the opinion of a spoiled eighties kid, someone whose parents funded him until he succeeded as a hack critic. This probably means his mom is a Karen like the woman who decided that I must lose my job despite she found a better one (Fuck Marine Bank for indulging in her intentions.). This explains why someone else would ask Canadian's to "Never Forget".

If there is a problem with "Turning Red", it is that I do not know when you can show it to a child. Why would any parent want their kids to think they do not need to be their perfect child? It is a lesson they need to learn before high school, which is why I relate to this story. Here is another reason to vote blue because the Fox News is going to get the Christian nuts who get to make the rules declare this as an enemy to (white) families.

Any movie that tells you to fuck conformity is a winner to me. Now I need to go through my Letterboxd to determine if I am a hypocrite. Having no guest lined up this week, I suppose I have the time. With that said...

Follow me on Twitter @catbusruss. If you want to be on the show, contact me on Twitter or send an email to russthebus07@gmail.com. All we need is a theme, movie, director, or actor and a focus on sub 100-minute material. As long as the credits start before the 1:39:59 mark on the runtime bar, the movie qualifies.

Tuesday, May 3, 2022

NinetyForChill: The #Podcast - Lo: From YouTube with Love, Demons, and Kodiak Thompson

NinetyForChill.com: The #Podcast

Episode 66: Lo: From YouTube with Love, Demons, and Kodiak Thompson ("Evil Dead" meets "(500) Days of Summer").

Eva's ode to Lo's poster.

Lo: From YouTube with Love, Demons, and Kodiak Thompson

May 3, 2022

Kodiak Thompson returns to offer up his insight about another horror comedy, Travis Betz's "Lo" from 2009. This romantic tale is all charm with a sense of humor that is akin to "John Dies at the End". It is like "Evil Dead" except the demons are more concerned with spouting and mocking philosophies instead of swallowing souls.



Allow me to get out of third-person. Happy Prof. Shurtleff of Illinois Central College? I (CM Darth) will try not to make so much light of violent death in this summation. This is my declaration of changing perspective. 

So, I have usually mentioned my handle in the third person when I post my summary for all the podcast apps. The previous paragraph should be removed in this case, but I have templates to maintain.

This episode is pretty brief all things considered. Kodiak wanted to keep it to about an hour, and I think it worked out great. He got to put his kid to bed at a reasonable, and we cut the bullshit out. The man knows how to stay focused on, and we benefit from giving this feature the respect it deserves.


"Lo" is the story of Justin. He and his girlfriend April were recently attacked by a demon. After this near fatal assault, April is missing, presumably taken to hell by the monster. This girl was Justin's entire life, so he will do whatever he can to save her.

With that said, it seems fortunate that he is in possession of her only possession, a book that is reminiscent of the Necronomicon. In it, there is a marked passage about a demon named Lo. If Justin can call upon him, the demon must fulfill his request. This seems like a sweet deal, provided that Justin remains inside the pentagram used to summon the creature.

Lo knows these rules, but also knows how to deal in technicalities. He knows what Justin wants now, but will that be what Justin wants after the tale of April Oaks is told to him? If that does not sway him from stepping away from this goal, fear and hallucinations might. Sarcasm and straight up insults might assist the demon as well.

Drexel Box Films - https://www.drexelbox.com/


For a horror movie, there are not really any scares or gore. It is a comedic character study. The characters are just scary looking and not afraid to mock someone's wounds, be it physical or mental. All of the demons are assholes, but they are the assholes you rely on when you need to be talked out of an iffy situation. Thus, you cannot hate them.

"Lo" is the perfect blend of early Sam Raimi and "classic" Herschell Gordon Lewis. The film is a one-act that play that I do not think could be sold to the off-Broadway market. Or perhaps it is too meta for that because it is shot as if it was a play, like many of the lowest Lewis features.

Thankfully, the humor is the attraction, and the humor is that of a restrained "Evil Dead". The film is basically Ash trying to reason with his possessed hand (literally in this case) about whether or not the journey to save one of the charming girls we all fell in love the 2000's is worth it. I am talking about the likes of Zooey Deschanel, Isla Fisher, Zoe Kazan, etc.

If there is one other thing to be thankful about "Lo", it is that it is currently free to stream. You will have to search "Lo Movie 2009" on YouTube. The resolution is not great, but the story is definitely worth 82 minutes of your time. Thanks Kodiak for pointing me in the right direction.

Follow me on Twitter @catbusruss. If you want to be on the show, contact me on Twitter or send an email to russthebus07@gmail.com. All we need is a theme, movie, director, or actor and a focus on sub 100-minute material. As long as the credits start before the 1:39:59 mark on the runtime bar, the movie qualifies.

Streaming Daylight Vampires & "The Return of Godzilla" (Godzilla 1985)

Ninety For Chill: The #Podcast with @CatBusRuss Episode 189: Streaming Daylight Vampires: Dracula Untold & V for Vengeance CatBusRuss...