*Blog post started on October 20, 2020.
My weekend was not too bad. They have hired enough newbies at the retailer that I work for the most part just have to make sure nothing goes wrong at check out and our customer service experts are now scheduled properly. Without too much pressure, I think I can work almost all the time. It keeps my mind off my existential crises and the pay makes it a net positive. Who needs a therapy when you could make $15 an hour?
I could probably get the same vibe by consuming my stockpile of Zoloft (as per the dosage directions). Work will free you is a bullshit comment in the end. It is just a different kind of numb. YouTube wormholes do not help.
Sunday was alright because I at least had the time to video games. Once the ex called to check on her cat and encourage me to abandon the written word for the video abyss, I decided to leave the gaming chair to get comfortable. Eva the Queen Kitty filled that spot immediately after I left to answer the phone, so that put an end to catching Pokemon. This was interpreted as a sign that I should watch a feature to feed the blogs. My little brother's abandoned copy of "Board Heads (a.k.a. "Beach Movie")" fit the NinetyForChill.com criteria (Longer than 75 minutes, Shorter than 97).
I do not know if I made it 15 minutes into this attempt to bridge Cinemax's late night features with early 80's dudes trying to get laid flicks that have aged poorly. The latter genre for the most part does not bother me too much. If you want to say that "Revenge of the Nerds" is far too rapey, I will remind you that the premise is REVENGE.
We are cool with brutal vengeance from "I Spit of Your Grave". Violence for violence is that case. Exploitation and objectification in the name of teaching a judgemental asshole, the mental scars are too harsh.
I would imagine that "Board Heads" would try to emulate something like that with Bronson Pinchot or Loretta Swit, but the Uwe Boll dialogue on top of establishing shots as the only direction lead to me tapping out early. Not early enough to put another flick in unfortunately if I wanted to watch "Last Week Tonight" at a reasonable hour. This lead me to return to YouTube before the episode aired, and probably an hour after it did so.
Yesterday was turning out to be exactly the same after "Being the Elite". AEW really needs to get an HBO Max hub or its own streaming product (like every other "major" promotion). If there is a decent What Culture Wrestling/Horror/Gaming video that shows up after I finish "BTE", you can count on me losing another hour. I knew I had to make something of the day.
There has been some jonesing for Jim Jefferies's humor since he left Comedy Central and I had success with a previous Oceania horror comedy in "Bad Taste". It was time for an iTunes impulse buy in "Me and My Mates vs. The Zombie Apocalypse".
"Me and My Mates vs. The Zombie Apocalypse"
A
"Walking Dead" like scenario has finally occurred in Australia. They
may not be the undead, but they seem to be rotting away quickly and they
definitely have a taste for human flesh. Everyone who is definitely
alive is searching for safety. Daryl, Joel, and their telecom supervisor
Roy know that the tower they work at has a security door, so sheltering
there will do for now. Joel has brought the beers, Daryl brought Betsy
the shotgun, and Roy is accompanied by his 19 year-old daughter Emma and
a vape pen. You cannot let the apocalypse interfere with quitting nasty habits.
If they can somehow get the tower to connect to the military's phone network, waiting it out is all they will need to do. The problem with waiting is that it is just plain awkward. Joel and Daryl had to finish off Roy's wife to secure the beer, and Emma is pretty frisky so Daryl's mind maybe a little preoccupied to give Roy the bad news about the missus. What should alleviate the tension only increases it as the interns, Ryan and Emma's boyfriend Lachlan, bypass the security system to hide out at the tower as well.
To make the situation more dire, the interns state that this outbreak is a result of the military's actions, so there probably will not be a rescue. In its place would be a cover up. Will seven shotgun shells, two flares, two paintball guns, and a stash of fireworks be enough to hold off the hordes? When the beer runs out, will there be any reason to fight on?
"Me and My Mates vs. The Zombie Apocalypse" is a fun homage to George A. Romero's "Night of the Living Dead", but lacks the drama to be a very effective zombie film. When cracking wise is the feature's primary function, if you do not incorporate the threat enough, a gravitas to the entire apocalypse is lost. For the budget though, you cannot help but be impressed by the effort.
The actors are competent enough that you have a vested interest in their survival, but there does not seem to be a lead actor. This function should have been more focused on the largest star the film had to offer in Jefferies. With some rewrites (think "Deep Blue Sea's" most memorable kill), the story concludes the same, but everything would be held together better until the point where it should fall apart. A greater range in characters may have helped as well, but when you are shooting on next to nothing (I would have removed the parking dogs that the mics picked up during filming.), you cast what you can afford to cast.
Or auteur Declan Shrubb could have held back on the gore effects. They are very solid and I believe any zombie movie fan will appreciate them. Shrubb probably knows that every excellent zombie film needs at least one gut buster, so I think the trade of makeup for a diverse cast is a fair one. This film will not be excellent, but Shrubb knows he has to work towards that.
As a director, Shrubb is adequate in close quarters, but is lacking when it comes to wide shots. That is really only evident in the finale because Shrubb is wise enough to shoot from high vantage points otherwise. Give this guy a crane or a track because he seems to have promise.
"Me and My Mates vs. The Zombie Apocalypse" is not early Peter Jackson, but that is because director Declan Shrubb is working with a more narrow scope. His feature is fun with excellent gore effects, but lacks the violence and intensity to provide great slashstick. Its story does not challenge the audience, so if you are looking for "Shaun of the Dead" light, this is fine suggestion.
Most B-movies with a similar plot are shot just to be shot. "Me and My Mates vs. The Zombie Apocalypse" is an attempt at art which will at least amuse you and fulfill your gore fix.
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