UWC 101...or was it 107?

The title kind of indicates the worst element of United Wrestling Coalition’s return to the Homer Opera House. More than most people, I appreciate Ramstein’s forgotten song from Vin Diesel’s “XXX," but a wrestling show is about the grapplers not the music (at least I assume that about Freelance and F1rst, working in hotels over the past four years makes it difficult to keep up on the Indie scene). If you do not hear the names and info about the performer, you can only rely on the local crowd to tell who to cheer and who to boo. When they are putting over the referee more than the competitors, you do not know how seriously you should take this promotion.

It may seem that I am not doing much to put over UCW, but it is a promotion that seems to have a lot of potential in spite of the middle of no where location in Homer. There seems to be a solid booking mind and they are the only kind of show that can effectively use the facility they are in. With all of the support posts holding the building up, I do not know how you can arrange seats for any other show.

Check out the rest of the blog at the Rip 'Em System Tublr.

"Don't let your babies grow up to be Cubs Fans, and always remember to spay or neuter your White Sox Fans," Russ Stevens

AAW: Art, Wisdom and Other Things Randy Doesn't Understand

I think it is difficult to argue the statement that All American Wrestling provides Chicago with the best wrestling. It does not have the perceived outlaw persona of Freelance Wrestling or Resistance Pro, and that is because it does not need it. You buy a ticket, and you are rewarded with the best wrestling showcase the region has to offer.

@AyyoLex - Pinterest

AAW currently seems to have an over abundance of riches. It may sound foolish to say there is a downside to showing off the best, but the promotion seems to lack identity. The best wrestlers will inevitably get signed to exclusive deals. When that happens, the most talented members of the undercard should be expected to step up to fill the vacant roles. Unless you can just find main eventers from other territories which is what the promotion that developed Tyler Black is ironically doing.

AAW feels like a YouTube Wormhole that you can check out in person, instead of a team you come to cheer on. As pro-wrestling's premier Cubs fan, I loved cheering on the team for 36 years as they developed into world champions. There were times that I wished ownership would just buy a title, but if that occurred, I would then be bitching about any time they did not win a title. That would make me a Yankee fan who is not from the five boroughs. To those fans, they are not your team.

Check out the rest of this blog at "Rip 'Em System - Tumblr" https://ripemsystem.tumblr.com/

January 2016: For Your Consideration: Wrestling not the Oscars

I left my journal/"Pokemon X" notebook in the car, so hopefully I'll have some interesting to blog about because otherwise I'll just look like a twat who can't take his eyes off their phone at a wrestling show.

I doubt anyone wants to hear about what I can definitely define as a midlife crisis (both my grandfathers passed away at 74, so I suppose we can call this my 39), and because my elbow is tensing up from overly aggressive lab work, sticking to overdone and ill ideas in wrestling seems like the wise thing to write about. This seems like a premise I can finish up with just quick quips between matches.

Bodily Fluids to Avoid:

This one isn't really overdone, but you have to pick the right crowd to do it in. Chicago's indie crowd allows you to get away with it thanks to Shimmer. The January 16th, 2016, AAW show had a crowd that liked to make the show about them, but had enough respect for wrestling being wrestling regardless of gender.if this was a WWE crowd, I would advise that woman not spit at each other. You're just asking for obscene chants.

Check out the rest of the blog at https://ripemsystem.tumblr.com/ 

www.dailystar.co.uk

Goon: A Good Heart for the Worst of the Game

Goon (2012) - MovieWeb

I must be working too much. Creatively, the best I've come up is pondering how little trauma is present in those children who witness their parents being senselessly murdered. You would think with the frequency in which it occurs, and no one can say it is too few, we'd get a Batman, Nightwing or Red Hood out of it. Being a millionaire is not necessarily a requirement, all you have to do is find someone who wants justice as much as you and was a trust-fund baby. If only we had a mass shooting at an Ivy League university...

That's a little too dark to tweet. It's definitely a tough premise to tag @midnight under #PointsMe.

The problem with the lack of creativity is namely the lack of Twitter and Facebook activity. It is awkward for my last three post to be a request to read the same screw the WWE blog (which reminds me that I have two hours left to jump on #Raw...phew...took care of that). Also, despite they were playful jabs about the girl I've been hanging out with recently (and I'd like to think all of my jabs as playful [it's my straight left and left hook you gotta worry about]), you don't want to place the Facebook friend request when they the bruises are still fresh.

Unfortunately, the jobs don't let me visit my folks and get satirically charged from my culturally insensitive mother. Fortunately, this give me a perfect transition into my review for the Jay Baruchel penned attempt to revive the hockey comedy genre, "Goon."

I think Baruchel's characters maybe a little too over the top with their obscenities (and homophobia) to prep the movie-going public for a "Slap Shot" reboot, but the film's story of misfits that few people, even fewer parents, seem to understand makes it a sports film that anyone with a never say die attitude can thoroughly enjoy.

Doug Glatt (Seann William Scott) is a kindhearted bouncer in Orangetown, MA, who just wants to find something to be passionate about. He is not cut from the same fabric of his Jewish-doctor father (Eugene Levy), has difficulty relating to his gay brother (David Paetkau) and just does not have the mean streak of his trash-talking, hockey-loving best friend Pat (Jay Baruchel).

Watching hockey seems to be his primary way of relaxing, but that is even made difficult when a visiting hockey player to Orangetown decides that Pat needed to shut his mouth during a five for fighting. Standing up for his less athletically-inclined friend, Doug decimates the "tough guy" to the point where the hometown coach decides that he is the ideal minor league enforcer regardless of actual hockey...or skating...talent.

With a little work from coach Rollie Hortense (Nicholas Campbell), Doug seems to have found his role in the world. Rollie's brother who coaches AA, Ronnie (Kim Coates), determines that he is the perfect addition to the Halifax Highlanders. Ronnie needs someone to protect and spiritually revive the play of the former first round pick, Xavier LaFlamme (Marc-Andre Grondin). Since Doug's idol, fellow enforcer and known headhunter Ross Rhea (Liev Schreiber), has returned to the minors to end his career, Xavier and his chemistry better develop quickly or the Glatt experiment will be for not.

As a fan of minor league hockey (sorry Hawks fans, I had to get to know the guys with the Indian Head on their sweaters before I cheered for them, hence, I cheered the Flyers on [Broad Street=Bush League] back in 2010), I really enjoyed "Goon," despite the strained attempts to remind us of the Paul Newman classic. It just cannot be that movie since the characters were not mean enough. After one locker room sequence in Halifax, you feel that the crude dialogue and scenario were just a desperate attempt to recreate the hockey cinema standard bearer's atmosphere.

The lack of meanness almost made the casting of Scott a mistake. Dimwitted characters, we know he can do that, but without a Stifler edge or at least a "Dude's Where's My Car?" confidence, the actor loses his charm. To Bauchel's credit (and perhaps casting experience), he knows how to incorporate a caring love interest (Amanda Pill in this case) to provide a third dimension to bring out his depth. His dialogue also features some great spots that shows there's something working in our naive protagonist head, so it works out well.

Scott and Schreiber's performances show the good spirits that tough guys can have which you do not usually see in sports films about bullies. These characters are far more admirable than the Hanson Brothers who were only dense and comic relief. The issue anyone would have with the movie, and discourage olde time hockey fans from watching it, is that it is a celebration and justification for what most consider to be the worst element of hockey. This element is fighting. With the exception of Don Cherry, no hockey pundit (who didn't play) will advocate that anyone should see this film.

Hopefully, if say...Michael Wilbon, saw this, they would leave knowing that this is not a film about violence, but one about good people trying to find their place in a world that just assume write them off. This is the story of my life, and I envy the characters for making it the way I try to live. Pardon that stint of cynicism because "Goon" is based on a true story. It is actually a message of hope, all be it for a short time of the emotional high I have been searching for.

The persons behind "Goon" could have probably spent more time studying the locker room atmosphere, but they do a fine job in presenting characters who have goals that most of society seem to feel are worth spitting on. It displays a great understanding of why some of us love the sport of hockey, and any one who wants to see the International game, should leave with an appreciation of why it's okay to drop the gloves.

If I've convinced you to watch this film, available on Netflix Streaming, maybe you'll give me a chance to convince you to give my B-movie zombie/wrestling project "Main Event of the Dead" support.

If you need a treatment of the script for "Main Event of the Dead" please e-mail me at russthebus07@gmail.com.

 

 

Robo Vampire: Hopping Taoist Vampire Monks and Some Thai Movie on the Side

With a premise like that, I should not feel like there is a need to rush writing this review before this hotel shift ends. How can you forget that? If anything, Amazon should contact me in regards to writing their Prime Video movie descriptions. After all, Walmart let me do their groceries for two years.

I am getting ready for a killer week. Close the retailer, open the retailer. Evening shift at the hotel, open the retailer (an hour earlier). Evening shift at the hotel, open the retailer. Tuesday will be wrestling video games and completing "American Gods." I am working Wednesday and Thursday, and then heading up to catch my first AAW show of the year on Friday. Then I gotta make it back in time to open the retailer the next day. Just try to will the idea that there will not be an eight o'clock meeting Saturday morning on top of all this.

So, I now realize that the next blog will have to be a review of the wrestling. It is not right to let something that hot simmer. Then again, publishing this movie review instead will extend the life of AAW's Never Say Die.

It can be fun planning for the future, at least one that you have under control. The rest is just ignorant customers and loud and incompetent guests. I could romanticize it with the battle of loved ones and personal passion, but things would be simpler with lousy Halloween costumes portraying robots and gorilla masks portraying vampires...so you would think.

Robo Vampire

It looks like the U.S. is at least making strides against the drug trade in Southeast Asia's Golden Triangle. Their patrols are so effective that the top exporter has turned to a Taoist priest to resurrect an army of vampires to counter them. After the priest makes a pact with the ghost of his premier vampire beast's lover, he seems unstoppable. Unbeknownst to them, the Americans have their own methods of resurrection.

Death will not keep top agent Tom Wilde down. With some simple welding, he is revived as the Robo Warrior, something that does not play by the rules of Chinese black magic. Perhaps this is why the main supplier has kidnapped Sophie, an American agent whose cover has just been blown.

Stretched thin, the Yanks have assigned the rescue to Thai mercenaries. Hopefully that gamble will pay off. Otherwise, all of the secrets of the Robo Warrior will be exposed.

The last three sentences of my "Robo Vampire" plot synopsis required more thought than any placed in the production of this film. This 1988 release was a quick turnaround rip off of "Robocop" but without the class that Italian directors provide. When the quality of the film stock immediately reminds you of a Rifftrax or MST3K short, you know you should not watch this without a fifth of whiskey and robot friends. Sadly, my Tom Servo tattoo remained silent through this presentation.

Maybe I am selling my screenplay for "Main Event of the Dead" at too high a level. I may have to call it a Q-Movie instead of a B-Movie Zom Com. Ask for a treatment by emailing russthebus07@gmail.com.

The last statement comes from Godfrey Ho's film being called a Z-Movie. There is such a discrepancy in quality, I better pick a different letter. This film makes the idea of filming in portrait seem okay. To try and ensure that someone will enjoy this, Ho more than likely only shot 45 minutes of robot and vampire stuff and attached a Thai Commando movie to pad out the runtime. This causes the film to quit being good bad and just be all bad as you are pulled away from the premise that you clicked on to watch something that would only be interesting if it was exploitative foreign cinema. No abuse of women or graphic violence, no value to a scum aficionado like me.

It is sad that Ho decided to take this route because the cheap effects that feature no concept about how any weapon works is constantly hilarious. The Robo Warrior story already tries to be something for everybody. You have the gore of vampires ripping out a throat or too. You have the "lady ghost" fighting in completely sheer white "robes". The vampires can only hop as conveyance, so no one will be scared from the theater. You have a slapstick scene when you realize that vampires can get hyped up on sugar, so you better keep them neck deep in heroin for storage purposes.

When you use firecrackers and bottle rockets instead of scribs, you cannot change it up for half the film with Cannon like action. You have not earned it and by the first cut to the Thai movie, the audience knows they do not want it. We were too busy enjoying the nonsensical cuts, why would we want this feature to suddenly make any sense?

"Robo Vampire" could have been and enjoyable mess, but chose to be a monotonous chore. There is no Wikipedia page for this film, but after enough Google searches, I had found there to be two "sequels". As a lover of the concept of "so bad it is good", I am considering tracking them down in hope that Godfrey Ho could nail this down once. With that said, leave it to me because you should not object yourself to watch a Break.com video that will more than likely become a train accident.

If your blissful ignorance can be stolen by "Robo Vampire", how can you trust Ho to not go after your soul with his other works? His techniques are the only vampires of his that makes sense.

https://makeagif.com/gif/robo-vampire-YcpVlw?ref=yo3Yhg

Schrodinger's Cat: Rationalizations of an Existentialist (Part 14: Buried further than Daniel Bryan)

With my recent reformatting of this blog, I should place my pleas for validation every other blog. Then again, if the odd number blog sucks, promoting my film project, "Main Event of the Dead," may be for not.

This blog should be about the progress of my script to production, but until there is support, this is dedicated to my social development or lack there of. Let's change that by asking me what can be done to assist in producing my tale of six, color-themed (a Tarantino tribute), "professional" wrestlers and their quest to obtain their only big pay day. Since their opponents are undead gimmicks that an absolute politically incorrectly Vince McMahon would salivate over (that still maybe an understatement), it maybe their final pay day.

Perhaps I should sell it as Peoria wrestling in a nut shell. Either way, shouldn't it be accurately captured? And at least you know how to contribute to the project if your not an artist or seductress to promote the film. You can at least offer me less pretentious names for the protagonist. Let me know at russthebus07@gmail.com

For those who keep up on the blog, sorry for not writing an installment last week. It was a tough weekend for me since it was Stacia Hardin's 32 birthday. As a "Star Wars" fan, I know that shouldn't be the case.

...

Rationalization 44: I'm Buried by Your Indifference.


Read the rest of this blog and other stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.

El-Hazard: russstevens.blogspot.com's Last Anime Review

This is one of the must own anime series as far as I am concerned. El-Hazard has the humor that would make it the perfect anime for Adult Swim. It would serve as a nice crossover for the AS fans who just want humor, and are pissed about the Saturday anime block.

Again this is an argument that I touch up a bit with my Animeflow website. Also, this will be the last anime review on russstevens.blogspot.com, so here is the only midi I have not reposted that will not fit with my new anime blog. Queen's "Another One Bites the Dust".


Check out the rest of this critique at AnimeRuss.blogspot.com - For those curious about anime but hate the geeks.

AnimeWallPapers.com
 

Almost Have All The Evangelion Manga Reviews Rescued from Geocities

Book 1 - Issue 6 --- Book 2 - Issue 1 --- Book 2 - Issue 2

Just one more set of reviews after this one, and I can stop this blog from being consumed by the past. But from a theological standpoint, or it a philosophical...fuck it, this is Evangelion, so will go with the prior...anyway the past is part of us, just don't let it consume you.

Why did I go with a quote (okay, a paraphrase) from "Master of Tai Chi" (favorite Jet Li film) which just confirms the statement before it? Probably the alcoholic part of me. Watch Master of Tai Chi to understand that.

As for the musical menu tonight, the theme for these reviews was "Glycerin" by Bush. I was looking for "Swallowed," but I suppose I was thinking faster than people were converting their Casio talents to data files.

Stage 6: I... Cry

After a nightmare with the same monster from his Eva experience, Shinji awakens in the hospital. Here he sees Rei again, and his father talking to her and only glaring at him. Misato comes to pick up Shinji and to discuss his lodgings.

Again, there doesn't seem to be much for character building in a non-action issue, but this stage is pretty good. There is a lot of comedy and a full story instead of the DBZ one piece of the action per issue deal. Also the ending of the issue gives us great incite into the character of Shinji.
Stage 7: Closing Hearts


Check out the rest of this critique at AnimeRuss.blogspot.com - For those curious about anime but hate the geeks.

Tokyo Godfathers: A Nearly Lost Tale of Understanding (At least I can relate)

I guess I've officially consider my financial state to be poor. This is because my shift at the front desk is just dragging on. Eight o'clock is the time that I like to start thinking about blogging, but it's 7:00 pm hence I've ran out of things to do with the Internet. At least things that I can afford to do with my time.

So, I gotta stay away eBay (despite there is an unusual abundance of blank championship belts for under $60.00) and Amazon (I can't even swing $35...better make sure my Nerd Block gets cancelled...shit, too late [crappy websites won't get a link regardless of the cool anime stuff I received]). Thus, I have to come up with a new plan to work around this, and further emphasize the need to get "Guy Does Finishing Moves on Zombies," to promote "Main Event of the Dead" finished. I'll throw that pitch at the bottom of the blog.

Fortunately, Netflix came through for me when I received Satoshi Kon's "Tokyo Godfathers." Sadly, renting it through this service is the most affordable way to do so (I really should have booted up my Window Vista PC, my Dazzle Video Import hardware and Roxio software...first time I ever consider using the tech for piracy). When you consider the old movies that may never see streaming services, the $7.99 DVD service is really worth it. And it kind of makes you have to watch it ASAP because if you do not, you negate the value of your purchase (like cancelling Nerd Block too late..."Evangelion," worth 35/"Mr. Bean," not worthless). This also makes my "not going to get shitfaced nights" dedicated to watching new flicks (to me) so I'll can get back into the practice of writing movie reviews. I figure my knowledge of film should further support why "Guy Does Finishing Moves on Zombies," to promote "Main Event of the Dead" needs to be completed. If he knows the medium so well, surely his script (that you can get a treatment of by e-mailing russthebus07@gmail.com) can't be too bad.

Keep in mind, this course of action will only occur on nights that I'm not going to be a poor bore at the front desk. I need to save my other sober nights for "Disney Infinity" and "Infamous."

Tokyo Godfathers

This film from one of my favorite anime directors ("Perfect Blue" is a must view) is quite an appropriate title when it comes to my developed course of action for slow hotel nights. Three homeless Tokyo residents are trying their best to be cheery on Christmas Eve, but it's difficult for the alcoholic Gin, transvestite Hana, and runaway Miyuki to stand each other, let alone accept the spirit of the season. God may be looking over them, because as they are digging through the trash for some classic literature for Miyuki, they hear the whines of a newborn baby.

Hana believes this is his "virgin birth" and decides that he must play the role of mother, refusing to listen to his compatriots that they need to turn the newly christened Kiyoko (translates to messenger of God) to the police. Because the immediate needs of the child, Gin softens his stance and Miyuki can relate to the child's plight in her own way. A compromised is reached in the morning when Hana demands that he cannot give the baby up until her parents explain their actions to him. So, the three that society have forgotten will venture on a quest to find a baby's parents that may lead the three to finally understanding and accepting each other.

I think Kon realized that story may be a bit cliche, so Yakuza, wannabe Droogs and hidden ailments of the three compatriots will present themselves to add greater challenges to our protagonists.

I will warn you this is a subtitled only release. The positive of this is that the authenticity of the translation cannot be questioned. The negatives are whatever the typical person has to bitch about reading. My only issue with the lack of a dub is that I like to see multiple angles to my animation. It's a different art to dubbing animation, and with anime's lack of mouth movement to the correct sound spoken, a good dub is about as good as a track where I will not recognize the actors. For fun, a dub can also throw in extra sounds/dialogue to explain the story even further.

Aside from this, "Tokyo Godfathers" is one of the best subtle stories I have seen in anime. Do not worry, crazy things will occur, but they happen to further our understanding of the characters, not to just break up monotony. It's kind of like the J. R. R. Tolkien adaptations to screen, but every action scene provides depth to the protagonist(s) instead of serving as an obstacle to present the illusion that the story is more than midgets walking towards a goal.

The character of Miyuki offers a lot more to be discovered about her, and the story only breaks the surface. Fortunately, the adult characters, the easiest to understand characters, are totally flushed out, so their stories and how they could seemingly coexist make the film very rewarding. Kon realizes that it is still a cartoon, so the film has a style that lacks realism which may make swallowing some of the tougher character traits a little easier.

Also he successfully reminds us of the medium with the incorporation of devices where characters comfortably break the fourth wall. They're very subtle devices that are not too far removed from Wile E. Coyote holding up one of his signs.

A huge positive of this film is how Kon was able to bring together three story-lines into just 90 minutes. That seems like a daunting task for many Asian directors to do with only one line to follow, and perhaps its through making the audience yearn to see the characters stick together that makes it work so well. Kon obliges, and you are given the time to pop "Perfect Blue" into the player (that's why I keep two VHS decks on standby) to see the range of his storytelling ability in just one night.

"Tokyo Godfathers" is a case for preventing a major distributor (Sony in this case) from getting a hold of marvelous niche films. I doubt there is any rush on their behalf for a Blu-Ray of this masterpiece in storytelling, so it maybe a decade before we can easily see this feature again. Since this and Kon's "Millenium Actress" suffer from poor distributing and Satoshi Kon has since passed away, I fear he may be forgotten in the states as one of the best directors of traditional animation.

Not my best closing, but I think its worth your time to listen to the following suggestion:

The "Main Event of the Dead" Test Reel Needs:

• Someone with some makeup or special effects experience.
• The true antagonist of the feature is a woman, so an actress to set up the premise of "Main Event of the Dead."
• Three or four wrestlers to take the finishing moves.
• One or two wrestlers to deliver the moves.
• A wrestling ring with a canvas that can afford to be left a little messy. If we can get extra from the crowd-funding campaign, we'll make replacing it a priority.

Since this is an effort to try and make this feature a reality, I can really only afford to compensate what ever is spent to make this video. I am willing to negotiate terms on what compensation will be for performances before the reel goes online. If whatever raised can cover the compensation agreed to, even if I do not reach the goal to produce the film, compensation will be had.

If you need a treatment of the script for "Main Event of the Dead" please e-mail me at russthebus07@gmail.com.

90-Min Netflix: Survivor - And Parenting to be Social - 2 More Bad Ideas

Who to curse today:

• The American culture of traveling youth summer sports?
• The Champaign and/or Urbana Chamber(s) of Commerce?
• The hotel's owners sending someone to see if we are staying on our feet and off our phones?
• Well, the fucking parent who just whipped out the acoustic guitar for starts.

Is it that we have to live with our neighbors the reason why kids younger than twelve have to travel to play baseball? I am not an advocate for AAU ball, but at least you know those kids are trying to physically earn a discounted education. Kids that lack teen in their age, can they be focused enough? Do they care about being better than anyone else in the state?

www.youtube.com

Personally, I loved playing only in my township. As a kid who was bullied a bit, but stuck to the main lesson of "The Karate Kid", those games were my only chance at vengeance. Unless a kid from Marquette Heights gave me some chin music or spiked me sliding into second, why would I want to see him humiliated? Hell, during my amateur/illegal wrestling/boxing days, it gave me an ego boost knowing some motherlover thought they had to fight cheap to beat me.

From the sound of it, it is solely about amusing the parents. We are not on the road to party. We are supporting our kids. It is just a bonus that we feel we can abandon all our responsibilities and considerations when we are renting our roof for a couple of nights. It is about time someone else answered my kids stupid questions.

I guess that sums up the initial paragraph. They are strangers, we are not going to see them again. To hell with their hearing and comfort. They suck for lacking kids.

It then leaves me to wonder if the Chambers think the locals are masochists. Why would you let assholes give you headaches? I know cash which then answers why I am standing for 13 hours today.

You would hope management would pass on considerations to auditors, like he was already standing for four hours. Then again, they have me being solely responsible for the satisfaction of 350 people. So, more reason I cannot wait to get a year in to then move on to bigger places, or liquor stores that pay the same.

I have not eaten anything today. Might be a wise thing to stick to. It is that or eat healthy.

My body is finally rebelling against me for a 24-hour Wednesday. 15 hours of sleep over three days, so I am overdue. The soul is willing, but the body is week. Despite the lack of stomach content, the back end is emptying and I think a popcorn hull in my gum ruptured something in there.

You might not dig my satire pieces, but you gotta respect my movie reviews. Popcorn abscess to watch a dry Milla Jovovich movie, please honor my sacrifice.

Survivor - A Title You Earn from Watching This

If you followed this blog, you know I will check out any Milla Jovovich film that did not seem to get a wide release. It is probably just an old crush from my sophomore year (better her that Chun Li from "Street Fighter 2: The World Warrior" right?), so I get protective of her when she is used in mainstream films. She is kind of an oddball, which is her charm, and how many directors know how to use that? I would rather she stick to films that will be lost before they make the Best Buy $3.99 bin than see her in a theater.

When I saw the cover for "Survivor", Pierce Brosnan scared me off. This guy was James Bond who earned a little more respect than Alice from "Resident Evil". Could Brosnan be as evil as his W. Bush adjacent character in "The Ghost Writer" without a wide audience to appeal to? It was not a drama like "Stone" where I am not expecting Edward Norton or Robert de Niro to kick ass, so this title just seemed like it was going to be all cliches and nothing noteworthy let alone possibly groundbreaking (like "Stone" attempted for Jovovich). And of course, I was right.

After a new update to the immigration paperwork, buying US work visas on the black market is next to impossible. Kate Abbot has been called to America's London embassy to assure that they will not be issuing new visas to potential terrorists. Some think she is being too harsh on applicants with compressed gas knowledge and the British authorities think she lacks compassion toward innocent, widowed physicians like Emil Balan.

Balan seems to be one to hold a grudge as he brought his frustrations up to a shadowy figure in a high tower to fix this issue. The evil one decides to assign the task of cutting through the red tape to The Watchmaker. His title is a front, but he does like to tinker with precise gadgets, like the bomb he uses to wipe out those in Abbot's chain of command. Kate was supposed to join them, but is only wounded in the blast.

The Watchmaker has never been identified, so Abbot is a hindrance that needs to be eliminated. Not knowing that she is running from an assassin, British police and her superiors are suspecting she may be involved in the bombing. It is up to her and her new keeper, Sam Parker, to find out the conspiracy before her diplomatic immunity will be revoked, perhaps permanently.

This week, I was able to check out Rifftrax's presentation of "Star Raiders: The Adventures of Saber Raine", so when "Survivor" opens with similar special effects, you suspect trouble. Fortunately, the effects only come out at night. 4K HDR may be bad for them, but most viewers will ignore this issue. James McTeigue is a clever enough director to make up for this short coming, but sadly the dull script cannot be saved.

If you cast Lelu from "The Fifth Element" in an action movie, you expect her to be a supreme being and kick ass. She is constantly on the run and shows no physicality until the third act. Brosnan is either James Bond or arrogant to his own shortcomings. Either way clever. There are no quips in the entire film.

"Survivor" is a game of cat an mouse, but neither animal has any obstacles to truly overcome. There are hardly and twists and the rare side stories are immediately abandoned. That is disappointing because that may actually give you a character with motivations towards their decision. I think McTeigue knew he was stuck with a bad film and just wanted to get the audience through it as quickly as possible.

There is nothing clever, crazy or comedic to make for a good PG-13 rated action flick and there is nothing extremely stupid to laugh your way through it. This is background noise that you may accidentally rewatch because it lacks anything memorable in it. A waste of time and talent, I might ask Netflix for the $0.02 "Survivor" took from me.

Those for Conceal and Carry: America's New Pets (Schrodinger's Cat: Part 13)

Before we get into my leftist agenda, which wouldn't exist on this website dedicated to a film production, I'd like to at least attempt to spark your interest in "Main Event of the Dead." This is a film I written about "pro" wrestlers who get conned into competing against undead wrestlers with borderline offensive gimmicks. Nudity, gore and comedy, this film will attempt to take wrestling to an extreme and back from those who say "Let's Go Cena!" Feel fee to ask for a treatment of the story by emailing russthebus07@gmail.com

If only I could get WWE Films behind it. I'd definitely have a better tag line: "If Cena Lives, We Riot."

Honestly, I do not know why anyone would be offended when I'm comparing those people to the most adorable creatures on this planet, cats.

A few mornings ago, I leave my second floor apartment to see the heartwarming visage of a black cat with white paws wondering on the balcony. This left me in a very vulnerable state since other residents were leaving for their jobs, and no one was attending to this sleek furball. After a few moments, I was left to follow suit. Without tags, no matter how undoubtedly loving this feline maybe, I couldn't leave a wild beast with my furry, fluffy and awesome cat Eva. At least if she...

Why do we assign the feminine gender to cats...or at least why do I...lets avoid my personal issues for a change with this blog.

If this lost godly creature had her tags, someone could at least knock on the door of the owner to inform them that their residence is less holy. Without a response, I could at least present her with a safe social environment until the bi-peds (sorry if I'm just assuming all my neighbors haven't sacrificed legs to the Bush administration) returned from their places of works.

I hate having to do anything that may serve to restrict...or just tick off...my cute roommate, but I determined that my cat needed to sport her tags. A challenge since she won't communicate her fashion sense. But on the bright side, this means I have a cat urine-free wardrobe, at least until she gets of 3/8th inch choker.

Rationalization 42: Everyone Needs a Visible Tattoo for Identifications Sake.


Read the rest of this blog and other stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.

More Evangelion Manga Reviews

I think it maybe important to point out the gimmick of "EvaUnit03's Tokyo 3 Station" was to come up with a rock n' roll soundtrack to the series.  Unfortunately, Lycos will not let me post the images and midi used for the site on this blog directly, so if you want to here the midi for this page Click here

Stage 4 Stage 5

Stage 4: Silence

Shinji is sent to the surface to face the Angel. One problem, how do you pilot an Eva? Our hero eventually gets Unit 01 to walk, but he can't stop it, so he decides to go with the flow. Unfortunately, something is willing to help Shinji with his original plan after a trip up.

At least we get somewhere with this stage. It doesn't cover much, but the action makes up for that. The key thing is that your guaranteed to get the next issue.

Stage 5: Angel Fire

Check out the rest of this critique at AnimeRuss.blogspot.com - For those curious about anime but hate the geeks.

DER MOND ( Neon Genesis Evangelion)

July 2009: If I could, would...

Current mood:  morose
Category: Blogging

Just trying to write something everyday. I don't know, it maybe a need to be challenged I guess.

If the older sister isn't hogging my bedroom (better known as my parents office space), I'll blog.

If I got time before class, I'll fill a page in the notebook next to the fabled first draft of my second screenplay.

If all else fails, I'll try to write based around the graphic on the next page in my Adrian Tomine journal Stef got me.

If I wanted a challenge, there's one. Every image is about relationships. What do I have to write about that topic?

It seems I've been getting little thrills out of simple stuff.

Conquering this cold, sinus infection, or side effect from all the Lipozene (which was working, but I decided to stick out the "if your throat swells you got to quit" warning). I think all the junk that I didn't leave on I-55 south just past Dwight has gone to my ear, so...

If I can resist the temptation of using my coupon for "Tiger Woods 10" (just so I'll have two Wii Motion Pluses so I can actually beat the crap out of Stef when I pick up my copy of "Wii Sports Resort"), I may have some change for a couple more bottles of the overpriced fiber. Got to keep pissing my little sister off by keeping up the weight loss.

If some for reason I get the break that I seem never destined to receive, and not off myself before the unemployment runs up, planning my third associates degree by Summer 2010 will kill sometime.

And I guess...

Read the rest of this blog and other stories at Main Event of the Dead.com and determine if this thought process can be translated into a B-movie comedy about pro-wrestling zombies.

Alice In Chains - Facelift Poster
 

Moon: A Sam Rockwell One Man Show

First off, let us thank the producers of "Moon" from preventing or at least delaying a remake of "2001: A Space Odyssey". I'm sure that Kevin Spacey would be perfect for the role of Hal, but thankfully he gave his voice to Gerty the robot. It is great to know that this generation will not be blamed for the desecration of Stanley Kubrick.

This film maybe Sam Rockwell attempt to prove himself as an unlikely leading man. Since "Confessions of a Dangerous Mind", he is probably considered the Seth Rogen of independent film when he should be considered the next Robin Williams. He should have been able to advance from comic support to legitimate actor like Williams has, but since I seem to be one of the only supporters of "Choke", it has not happened.

Moon is dependent upon a great performance by its lead, and if the character was a bit more memorable, Rockwell performance should be talked about in the early months of 2010.

In the future, the world has become dependent upon fusion energy. Too difficult to produce on Earth, the Lunar company stores the excess helium and heat that is captured on the dark side of the moon to supply 70% of the worlds fuel. The entire operation on the moon is operated by Sam Bell (Rockwell), who has agreed to work there for three years. Lonely with two weeks left before he sees his wife and child, he has an accident during one of the harvests.

Gerty the robot has seemingly saved Bell and for "his protection" has quarantined inside the space station. Desperate to figure out what has happened to him, he escapes to find his wrecked vehicle with himself inside of it. Now, Sam must peace together what has just happened, and possibly what has been happening since there is noway to communicate with Earth for an explanation.

"Moon" is definitely the closest thing to 2001 that we can expect anyone to create. It embodies isolation to greater degrees than the classic, but is about a far simpler concept. That concept is discovering who one truly is.

The other thing that will draw comparison is the simple, but seemingly realistic space environment. 2001 is considered by many astronauts to be the most realistic portrayal of the outer worldly experience, so aside from necessary technological advances, a simple easy to navigate appearance is essential.

To further look into the simplicity of the film, one must address that there is only one actor in it. This actor is the extremely fortunate Sam Rockwell. It is not a humorous role that you associate with him, but his ability to seemingly maintain a sense of humor allows him to be perfect for this role. By no means is Rockwell the only person who can portray Bell, but I doubt anyone can do this better. Especially when you consider Rockwell's ability to make sure that all of the characters play the roles of foil to each other.

Moon shows why great space films may need to be left to independent minds. These directors, like Duncan Jones, know that not all environments have to be action dependent, and that there are so many realms that can be discovered in these dreamed up worlds. Add in a true understanding of SCIENCE fiction by both crew and actors, Moon might be the best space picture of our time.

And that's before we get into the film's political arguments.

www.imdb.com

"Underworld: Blood Wars" and R-Rated Table Reads for Kids

The original subtitle for this blog was "Maximizing the HDR but not Charles Dance." I bring up Charles Dance in the blog title having recently seen "Godzilla: King of the Monsters". Do not forget the birthday gift that your parents had gotten your significant other. There are consequences.

The original plan was to celebrate our anniversary with "John Wick 3: Parabellum" but the 4K in the living room was not enough to get her to quit pouting about the franchise even though she wanted the "puppy." So with the lack of presents as well interest, my argument that we cannot dive into the franchise without the first film fell upon deaf ears.

Enough giving into her sad faces and talk about mine. Once you invoke Eco-terrorism and give it a lead, that (Charles Dance) is the villain of your film. Until you get through this film's credits, the villain is forgotten about. It is a pretty dull flick between him escaping with the monster-control device and the last scene.

"Last Action Hero" was misguided, but Charles Dance kept it interesting. How did no one in a test audience not scream for more Royal Shakespeare Company pedigree? Especially after how "Game of Thrones" went after Tywin Lannister left.

PG-13 means live-action, kid-friendly Russ. Did you forget that? Maybe, but that is probably because I am pissed about the default PG ratings animated films now receive. Everybody poops, spits and farts MPAA. Quit trying to brain wash parents in an effort to avoid children doing that. They knew the risks.

I do not know. Perhaps, test screening the last season of "Game of Thrones" on kids could have better directed the conclusion. Aside from the brothel scene in episode 67, the boobs to dragon ratio was surprising low. The violence may have been a bit intense. My compromise, have elementary school students sit in on the table reads.

I think 50-65% of those bitching about the conclusion of "Game of Thrones" are not smarter or as patient as fifth graders. Reading to an audience like that, I would bet my left one (or any non-essential appendage or duplicate organ [just leave me with enough fingers with their matching arm to pitch] against any five-figure sum for any takers out there) they would shout bullshit when the "fans" did. Would that be any worse than when my fifth grade teacher read us all of the "Chronicles of Narnia"? At least there is no separation of church and state issues with my idea.

You would think it would be tough to get back to my latest 90-minute movie review after that rant, but I must be clairvoyant. The first word of the review I wrote in what I think was January of 2018 was...

Bookworms are tough to read as film goers.

Underworld Blood Wars:

Before my current beloved, my last girlfriend was a lost 22-year old on Seroquel-prescribed mess (the past is the past), so it was easy to keep her amused with flashy imagery. The William S. Burrough readers who left me bankrupt would find other means to distract themselves. The roommate I had a literal falling out with had little time for appreciating pop corn cinema because her boyfriend at the time embraced it while ignoring our tendency to indulge in Milla Jovovich films not directed Luc Besson.

Tuscola's finest nose being in books made it so she never kept track of gimmicky cinema, and since all of our motion picture library for the first year of our relationship had to be viewed in the common living space, it was tough to catch her up on it. Despite all of the distractions, she is amused by chicks fighting monsters. Regardless if she retains any of the plots, I am not allowed to watch any of their sequels without her.

www.pinterest.com/CloakedReaper

Thankfully, with me initially installing the 4K equipment in the bedroom, she would have to become a cinephile. There are no arts and crafts to distract her. Just the need to deal with all of her questions from the previous franchise installments that competed against yarn balls for her attention.

Fortunately, "Underworld: Blood Wars" did not inspire a refresher. The film returns to what the first film in the series promised, vampires versus werewolves. If it makes a viewer inquisitive, it is only about what they had previously seen the British actors in.

Humanity has abandoned their purge of violent "Twilight" characters. This leaves the war between vampires and lycans to focus on capturing a hybrid to dissect for the cause of securing their clan's respective future.

The only person who can lead anyone to one of the werepires is the death dealer Selene. To ensure this cannot happen, she has hidden her daughter and arranged it so she will not know the child's location. Thus, she is left wandering the Earth only to be amused by killing those dumb enough to chase her. That can get dull, so she has become nothing more than a reverent of regret hoping it will end soon.

David the vampire prince is able to track her down and tell her that she will be welcomed back into the coven to train new death dealers since the lycan threat is only growing. If one half of her pursuers can be eliminated, this may allow her to knock off the absentee mother routine. But everything in her thousand-year life has been based on a lie, so there must be a vampire or two planning her demise.

Selene will need a new trick to escape and end her foes, so the film leaves you to brainstorm. Will you guess correctly or inadvertently prepare a treatment for the sixth film?

It is a good time for fantasy with the success of "Stranger Things," and "Underworld: Blood Wars" capitalizes on the audience accepting any convoluted premise. The viewer has fun trying to out think the dungeon master/screenwriters Cory Goodman's plot and is rewarded with an amusing story advancement. There is nothing about this film that can be taken too seriously, you will catch on to that quickly and enjoy the ride.

There is nothing noteworthy about the fight sequences, but the environments and the amount of action will keep your attention. Unlike the previous films, characters who survived  are further developed (Charles Dance), so you get something they totally dismissed with Scott Speedman's character. If you were angry about that hollow love interest was left out of the previous film, you receive a quite satisfactory resolution to your complaints.

Perhaps the best aspect of this feature is that it keeps moving. No moments are taken to add weight to events. It is a "Dynasty Warriors" video game put on 35 mm. You came to see vamps and wolves bash heads. As an indie wrestling fan, I can appreciate the decision to skip story and just spreading the thumbtacks on the canvas. We do not need Stephanie McMahon showing us how she verbally loves licking her lips for 20 minutes...ever.

And that is why people immediately doubt my sophistication when I mention wrestling, regardless of the alliteration.

"Underworld: Blood Wars" is how a ridiculous 80's feature premise can still work in the 21st century. A familiar face and action is all you need. Just keep it brief (under 100 minutes) and the effects worthwhile, and you can get the audience to accept anything. This is "Cruiser Weight Classic" film making, not "205 Live".